Perks of Online Dating

Jasbina Ahluwalia asks Cija Black, author of in Modern Love: The Grownup’s Guide to Relationships & Online Dating: Let’s switch gears and talk about online dating. You mentioned that you did it and people would come to you for tips.

What is it that appeals to you about online dating? What do you like about it? Why did you choose to do it? Why do you recommend it?

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Cija Black

I started doing personal ads when I was in college. Then I evolved with it as it evolved into online dating.

On and off, I would be in and out of relationships. I always gravitated towards that. I’m a bit of a dating nerd.

Perks of Online Dating: What’s Out There?

It’s nice to be able to look at profiles and get a sense of what’s out there. I would think, “What is it that I’m looking for and not looking for?”

As you look at a lot of profiles, you start to see those patterns.

You might think, “That’s something that I want to stay away from.” Or “I want a little bit more of that.”

Perks of Online Dating: They Want A Relationship

For me, it’s always been helpful to be able to see things in that way. You, hopefully, know that people are single and they’re not lying about their status.

It’s about knowing that at least people are looking for a relationship if they’re on a dating site.

Perks of Online Dating: Start at Your Pace

How do you interact with these people? It’s a way to flirt a little. You can dip your toe in as little or as much as you want to depending on how you want to approach it.

I’m an Aries. I tend to dive into whatever I do. I would get pretty aggressive about dating. I went on 25 plus dates in about six weeks. I really got into it.

For me, with the repetition of it, it became clear to me what I was and wasn’t looking for.

It was a lot easier for me to start turning my experiences into what I was looking for when I did that. I do not recommend that for everyone.